This Just In: Stupid Baby Names Edition

When your mom is as insane as Mariah Carey, and your dad is as random (and some would say gold-digging) as Nick Cannon, I fully expect the children to grow up entirely messed up. Or they’ll become president. That’s the way the world is going these days (see Donald Trump’s presidential bid).

Mariah painted butterflies on her nine-month pregnant stomach, lives in Barbie’s dream home surrounded by nothing by Hello Kitty merchandise and her husband is equally certifiable because he considers all these antics to be business as usual.

Naturally, I expected the pair of them to give their babies stupid crazy names. And they did not disappoint.

Baby 1: Moroccan Scott Cannon

Baby 2: Monroe Cannon

And there you have it.

Their son, whose first name is an ADJECTIVE, sounds like some form of military artillery produced in North Africa, while their baby daughter was named after a drug-addicted sex symbol.

See below for further evidence of Mariah’s diagnosable insanity.